Unhealthy pride is the last refuge of fear.

A trickster that’s oft confused for self-love. It’s difficult to notice because it operates at a higher level than anger, sadness, or despair. But it’s still not a higher emotion like: courage, joy, or peace.

A hallmark of healthy pride is gratitude; being grateful for what we have, both tangible and intangible. It exists within a clear understanding of our limited circle of influence.

A blending between our needs and the needs of others.

It melds cohesively with rationality.

Unhealthy pride tells us lies, extending beyond rightful personal boundaries.

• That we are better than others.
• That we are above certain types of work.
• That our perspective matters more than others.
• That we are allowed to step over the rights of others, because we are righteous.

Unhealthy pride says we have far more control than we do, stunts our growth, limits our opportunities, and blinds us to the beauty of life.

• It is our license to blame.
• It gives us an excuse to not move forward in life.
• It tells us that we know best, that our opinions are worth gold, and that others don’t get it.

As with all barriers along the path to self-improvement–dare I say self-realization–overcoming this one is amply rewarding. How much energy do we waste on things we can’t control? On wishing we had more power? On wondering why others can’t see things the way we do?

Unhealthy Pride Is Hard to Kick Because It Feels Safe

“For pride is spiritual cancer: it eats up the very possibility of love, or contentment, or even common sense.”

– C.S. Lewis

It makes us want praise for everything we do.

It tells us that our stagnation is because of others.

If it wasn’t for “them” we could be happy.

It rears its head in different ways for different people. For some, it keeps them clinging to the group. For others, it keeps them stuck in isolation.

It is a protective agent so it seems safe.

Because unhealthy pride is often espoused, it’s even more insidious.

Many people don’t know it’s not the high state it seems to be. They may not even recognize it in themselves. They don’t know a life beyond it. A life of courage, peace, and joy.

Pride says: “Stay here. Opinionated and holier than thou.” Oblivious, we stay locked in lies until we pierce through them by looking within.

Lies camouflaged with coats of cherry-picked logic.

That disperse like smoke in the light of awareness.

Agreeing with unhealthy pride is agreeing with the most sophisticated aspect of our lower nature. We fall easily into this trap because it seems so advanced.

If you aren’t content within, you will see the worst aspects of the world and everything in it. Be that religion, society, or even your own family. Nothing exists in a one-sided way.

All things have many sides.

Whether dark or light, good or bad–the side you choose to see will be amplified within your experience.