In my article “My Journey into The Silence”, I discussed how I’ve embraced spending more time alone.
By spending more time alone, I would say:
- I get better sleep
- I’m more creative
- I’m more grounded
- I make better decisions
- My relationships are better
- I eat better and exercise more
- I worry less and have less anxiety
- I save a lot of money, time, and energy
When I refer to being alone, I do not mean being entertained or otherwise mentally distracted. I mean being alone in a quiet place with very few or no distractions.
Being alone might be:
- Sitting quietly in a room
- Going on a solitary walk
- Sitting quietly in a park
Being by yourself and watching TV or staring at a smartphone doesn’t count, because you’re not giving your mind any space. Instead, you’re giving it new things to mull over.
A key to effective alone time is that there’s no input in the form of human-created information. However, output from the mind — such as journaling — is acceptable. This allows the mind to begin organizing and clarifying the data it already has.
My alone time usually consists of sitting and sipping tea or coffee in my study, which is very quiet.
I may also mind map or jot down ideas if my mind is busy.
Being Alone Is a Luxury for the Soul
For many people being alone might be difficult.
For various reasons, there are usually barriers to the prospect, such as a busy family life, work responsibilities, or other restraints.
But even spending a short time alone each day can give a person’s mind a little extra space to operate without the bustle of normal activities.
With consistency, just 5 or 10 minutes of being alone and in silence will allow many benefits to shine forth from within.
The Subconscious will Begin Purging Itself
In the silence, any negative thoughts and emotions will be brought up from the depths of our subconscious–to our conscious attention–to be dealt with.
If this negativity isn’t dealt with, it is just dead weight in our mind. Dealing with it (through letting go) frees up a lot of energy that our mind can then begin using to focus on other tasks.
This purging period can be painful and last for a long time; this is the difficult part of spending more time alone. And I think it’s what deters many people.
Once we deal with whatever junk our subconscious is harboring, being alone will continue to bring greater clarity, allowing us to grow ever faster.
Meditation Takes Aloneness to The Next Level
Being alone is a fantastic way to start improving our lives in various ways.
The abundance that naturally arises from clearer thinking should be–by itself–enough of a benefit to lure a person into the idea.
Adding meditation to our alone time takes everything a step further. Through it we begin to wade further towards peace and enlightenment. It quickens the healing benefits of being alone.
But like all catalytic agents of change, it is not without its possible problems.
A Word of Caution From My Own Experiences
Meditation and being alone are gifts from the ether. But, because they often spur on the pain of emotional release, they aren’t always recognized as such.
Besides perhaps a near-death experience, there are no better or quicker ways to profoundly get to know yourself.
When I first got serious about my meditation practice, I was quite naive and I made a “big to-do” about it to the people closest to me.
I wanted to share what I had found with them. I knew this activity was profoundly changing my mind, my perspective, and the course of my life. I saw them struggling and I felt they could benefit from the practice also.
All I managed to do was push everyone away and stir up issues for myself and them. Ironically, I also pushed them away from meditation.
I didn’t understand this at the time, but meditation was amplifying everything about me; the good and the bad.
I was lucky because I had some expert guidance in the form of a yoga instructor who had spent nearly 40 years in a Hindu monastery. At some point maybe I’ll write more about that experience and the time I studied under him.
Even with that guidance, I was ill-prepared for everything that would transpire in my life in the next few years. I was in for a ride… from the depths of darkness to the heights of bliss.
So, if you want to spend more time alone or in meditation, but there are a lot of barriers in your way, here’s some “expert advice” from someone who made every mistake they could in this area:
Make your moves subtly. The fewer people you tell about what you’re doing the better. If people around you aren’t open to these ideas, that’s okay. You will only influence people positively by being calm and listening to them. Even if what they say seems mundane to you, just listen. Your soul will speak what needs to be said without any help from your mouth.
Spending Time Alone Gets Easier
When I first started being silent and alone, it was a struggle. I would often distract myself with food or entertainment. I was running from the pain that comes with healing.
I would want to be satiated by some activity that used to satisfy me, but they no longer sufficed.
Slowly, I began to intuitively understand that the bliss and peace that I had formerly attributed to those things wasn’t coming from them at all.
Those beautiful qualities were arising spontaneously… when my mind was calm.
Though it started a little rough, spending time alone is something I now love.
And I’m not sure I’d be here writing this without it.
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